Dawn Donohoo

“Are you obsessing over a breakup?” This article caught my eye immediately. Breaking up is so hard to do, even if you are the one who did the breaking up. In my case, I have been struggling with questioning everything I did and said in my past relationship. Could I have done anything to change the outcome? Was living on a farm in Gilbertville really all that bad? Could I have dealt better with the political and religious difference? Were our beliefs really that far off from one another anyway? Is another man going to ever be as wonderful as he is? Questions, questions, questions, I could go on and on all day.  The real issue is, the relationship ended and ultimately I couldn’t stop it!

“So how do you stop negative post-breakup thoughts and feelings from running your life? The key is striking a balance between proactively dealing with them and distracting yourself from them.

The first is necessary because if you don’t deal with the breakup it will likely find a home in the back of your mind and sit, stubbornly festering away.

Distracting yourself is crucial as well. Let’s go back to the brain for a minute: positive thoughts have their own chemical reactions, just like negative ones. That means that just as your brain can become wired to think negatively, it can become wired to think positively.”

The advice to stop negative post-breakup thoughts, by  striking a balance between proactively dealing with them and distracting yourself from them is brilliant. I’m a big believer in positive thoughts as well.

My action plan to stop the questioning goes like this.” Of course living on a farm in Gilbertville is not for me. The political and religious differences were both of our problems. Yes our beliefs were that far off, it cause us to break up!, and of course there will be a man out there as wonderful as he was!” Now that all  said, I will get busy and actually decide to move on. It is summer after all and I have a super hot swim suit I can’t wait to put on! Let the summer fun begin!