Dawn Donohoo

Rapid Attachment

An abnormally quick attachment to an individual is often the first sign of a controller. Controllers tend to be self-involved and have shallow emotions towards others. However, during the “honeymoon” phase of the romance, it may appear that the individual is selfless, constantly showering you with gifts, praise and devotions of everlasting love. What may seem like love everlasting may in fact be a shallow emotion, which will quickly fade and be replaced by detachment. If your loved one wants to get married soon after you begin dating, it may be a bad sign.

Jealousy and constant watch over your actions:
In the initial stages of a relationship, constant phone calls may seem cute, but when a person keeps tabs over every minute of your life, well, you do have a problem on hand! A person who loves to control the partner would keep calling to know why you shopped or who is it you are hanging out with at the coffee shop. Letting your partner know about your plans is a nice thought but giving explanations all the time is not so nice really. Besides, such a partner would be jealous when you catch up with your buddies.

Isolating you from friends and family

Discouraging you from pursuing outside interests

Perpetually blaming you for their own actions (anger, cheating, yelling, etc.)

Embarrassing you in public

Constantly discounting your feelings

Cycling through mean and nice streaks

I have personally experienced a controlling relationship, and have know others who have been in them as well. A person who is controlling will often try to get away with their way by relying on the victim to believe they are just insecure. This has got to be the biggest BS ever. A controlling person is not insecure, they are selfish. Everything has to be their way and if  it isn’t then they will stoop to any level to get their way.

I also want to point out that a controlling person is not gender biased.  When it is a man, he may tend to show more force to get his way. A woman will use tools of manipulation. She will cry almost all the time. Guys don’t be fooled by a woman who can cry on the spot especially if the crying attack happens around something that she is wanting and if you are not submitting to her.

To everyone who is actually dating or is still in the dating game. It is very important that you notice the signs of a controlling person.  The ultimate goal in finding someone to share your life with, is to be with someone you can trust your heart and soul. Trust me a controlling person will take the very life in you and feed it to the dogs and before you know it, you are already brain washed and not even sure who you really are anymore. Thus being the worst relationship anyone could ever get into!!

Dating Coach, Dawn Donohoo

Tags: Advice, Controlling Relationships, dating, Dawn Donohoo, Men, Women